Some people ask, why He did not specify clearly the characteristics that men should be selected by the prospective spouses. Hadith explicitly mentions only the characteristics of women who often sought by men of a religion other than three more if necessary.
If men are given guidance to choose a good woman, why not have a guide for women to find husbands. They said if there is guidance sure she did not choose her husband made a mistake in the future.
It is obviously He did not mention that usually only men seeking women. But if real women really want to find prospective husbands, they can go as Khadijah choose her husband, the Prophet.
In the early stages of Khadijah and sent spies to look more closely personal. Intelligence that would just make a correct report of what it dirisikkan. As a result he was able to marry Muhammad and it appears that the best option.
Among the features that can be detected in Muhammad himself at that time were:
1. Honest and not take advantage of
2. Trust with the task
3. Shy with women
4. Religion and the fear of God
5. Can be a leader.
Believe me if he has these features, and are viewed favorably by his wife, but mutual respect to any time even in old age. Husband in sin shall not be good people, let alone with God.
However, the husband has a feature on women who must also find religion to create a happy, peaceful home. The combination is said to be compatible or kufu.
The question now, wujudkah men who have features on at this time? Such men can be found at the roadside, in gardens, on the market and the like? Only women who will not meet his bride at the places and the man who would not meet the above characteristics.
This is the reality that occurred on this day, couples who marry in that situation, Happy at first, but problematic in the middle road. In fact, several cases were found, the couple did not know or do not want to perform prayer.
It is evident here, as well as men to find wives who believe in religious and other beauty, dignity and pure good, women should choose to be good husbands based on the features above. For that, the woman should have the intelligence, as done by Khadijah.
When husband and wife are in accordance with the above features they need to maintain that position until the end of life. Besides the husband and wife can maintain that happiness is achieved by the following hadith based on:
Ahmad, an-Nasaie and al-Hakim narrated from Abu Hurairah that the Prophet said, meaning: "The best of women is a pleasant man when he saw it, the obey him when he told him and he did not violate her with something menyukakannya itself and its property "(Hadith narrated by Muslim).
She is good in accordance with the above hadith is he must be prepared to exhibit the best performance for her husband while in the house. That is, when her husband returned home his wife greeted by friendly smiles. He provides drinking water for thirsty potential husband. Husband in that situation would be happy even though there may be a problem before. Problems can incur heavy loss when treated as such.
The wife continued to obedience to the husband in all circumstances, especially when asked by her husband. She would not object to the requirement as long as the husband who asked not violate the tenets.
Even so, what's important in this regard was the wife does not make something that is not liked by the husband. So, all of which shall be his wife, he will ask for blessing and her eyes first.
Three basic points should be taken care of by the husband and wife in the face of either the husband to meet the above characteristics or not. Perhaps the problem does not arise when dealing with a good husband, but a big challenge when faced with her husband instead. But if the husband and wife to discipline, that's a great success buatnya.
For example, the husband forbids his wife pray or cover your shame, he could argue both ways. He will draw attention to prayer and stay close to the ground of God's commandments. In later years, the husband will understand and she will also perform prayers in istiqamah after that.
So, for those who got married is proposed to list what they liked each other by the husband and wife, also what is not liked both. With this they will be looking carefully so as not to do things that are not preferred partner.